Osborne Slips In Pee…rage

Government sums guy Gideon Osborne, or Jeff to Prez Obama, used his annual Mansion Speech to the City yesterday to say some pretty decent things about the banking sector. Ya know – a mere FIVE years since it all went to shit (Goldman Sachs we’re looking at you…) Turns out the Government is fattening up some investors ready to sell its bit of Lloyds Bank or something.

We’re no mathematicians so not sure what this means in real terms – man on the street, living standards, can I afford to eat this week sort of stuff – but we’re pretty sure it’s not time to crack open the bubbly and live like it’s pre-1929 America just yet.

Anyway, on to the good stuff. In his speech about how well his plans are going Georgie casually slipped in that he’d be handing out a peerage to out-going Bank of England big boss Sir Mervyn King. Being a Sir is so un-vogue these days – it’s all about the lordships which is exactly what ol’ Merv will be receiving.

Now call it jealousy if you must but here at The Spin Alley we’re not so sure the last half a decade qualify as ‘good enough for a Lording’. However, seeing as we now live in a reverse universe where bad is good and bust is boom we decided to put together our suggestions for inappropriate rewards.

Luis Suarez for Most Sporting Player of the Year after he managed to only bite ONE Chelsea player during their match.

Chris Brown for Best Boyfriend because he’s so far only beaten blokes up in 2013.

Hitler gets a posthumous mention as Pet Lover of the Year for his love of dogs.

Charles Saatchi is our Knight in Shining Armour for accepting a caution for assaulting his wife to save it from hanging over her.

Rhianna wins Role Model of 2013…come on, do we really have to spell out why that’s ridiculous?!

You can see where we’re going with this but who else would make your list?

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Written by Angharad

Angharad is a former radio journalist balancing a career in PR with an insatiable writing habit that spans more topics than she can count on her smaller-than-average hands. She's passionate about the media, women's rights and politics with a love of travel, culture, entertainment and all things lifestyle on the side. Interests include prolific online shopping (bit of a reputation in the office), musicals, dinosaurs (be honest, they're awesome) and tweeting anything and everything from @Welsh_PR

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